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a.b.toklas, Armedpsycho, BodyHeadBanger, Cocheese, CocoonOfHorror, darja, kapoorpatel, MagnumCT, n4tacon, PBJ Penn, truefan, xxxusagirlsexxxtt
Most users ever online was 412, 06-26-2005 at 02:46 AM.
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Dumpy or Punny, who is the greater American?
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Elroy82 is SO gay - 66.67%
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» CRO COP VS. DOS SANTOS – THE CLASH OF THE TITANS
Sep 15, 2009 - 7:19 PM - by vodkaholico
CRO COP VS. DOS SANTOS – THE CLASH OF THE TITANS
By Eloy82

Saturday. September 19th, 2009. Somewhere in the good ol’ United States of America. Two men will meet. One man will reign supreme. The other will not. The fans will cheer “USA! USA! USA!” in unison as a Croat and a Brazilian enter the Octagon.

Cro Cop is fresh off his greatest UFC victory over Mustapha Al Turk. We all remember Cro Cop for his vicious head kicks and effortless, albeit repugnant, hip tosses. We are now about to see whether he can score another victory in the UFC without his best (and only) weapons – ignoble kicks and repugnant pseudo-judo techniques. He managed this against Al Turk but Dos Santos is of an entirely different nationality. Specifically, he’s Brazilian and it doesn’t take a professor of biology to know that Brazilians are light years ahead of the Turks in combat sports. Cro Cop is Croatian and this bodes not to well for his chances in this fight. The recent loss of his national football team to England will surely play on his mind as he enters the ring against one Dos Santos, a man he is facing after beating Al Turk… another man he beat in no other country than… England. This association will surely cause Cro Cop some serious mental anguish, and we all know that when a fighter is suffering emotionally, his striking suffers in a perfectly positive correlation. We remember Ninja Rua vs. Kharitonov back in Pride. His otherwise brilliant striking... [Read More]
167 Views
» The Current State of MMA
Aug 15, 2009 - 5:11 PM - by kweiss
The Current State of MMA
Part 1
By Eloy82

Here we are… the year is 2009. 10 years ago we were wondering whether the sport of MMA (or NHB as we used to so lovingly call it) would survive. Gone are the days where we, not unlike animals, scrounged for MMA by trying to download fights online or by sending cash to some dudes in Brazil who promised to send us back a VHS of a Vale Tudo tournament that may or may not had happened. Gone are the days where you could go to school or work and ask a friend: “Hey, did you see the latest UFC?” and receive a “What in the world are you talking about?” reply. Gone are the days where you’d catch innocent bystanders in armbars just because you could - just because you saw Royce do it.
Today you no longer need to send money to Brazil. Today everyone knows what the UFC is. And today everyone has submission defence.

Sound ideal, doesn’t it? 10 years ago we could have only dreamed of the world we’re living in today – the world where MMA is readily available on TV, where you can discuss it with every moron at work and where you can grapple anyone and everyone on the street without it being weird.

So why am I crying then? Why are tears rolling down my fat, sweaty cheeks? I’m crying because the sport that I used to love so much has turned into something commercial, unholy and despicable. When people like... [Read More]
203 Views
» The Return of Cro Cop
Jun 20, 2009 - 8:10 PM - by The Kraken!
The Return of Cro Cop
Part 1
By Eloy82

June. The 13th. Man. Alone. Standing. 2009. Cop. Unmoved. Severe. Victorious. Cro.

“I really didn’t like when he did that with his eyes…” Cro Cop resolutely commented on his opponent’s ignoble antics at the end of the fight. This sort of resoluteness, the kind of which we haven’t seen from Cro Cop since the early days of Pride when he blew kisses to Wanderlei Silva, can only mean one thing: Cro Cop is back.
June. The 13th. Britain. Turk. Germany. Mostapha. Poked. Dana. Poked. Cro Cop is back.

“I am in the best shape of my life. After many injuries, finally I feel perfect. Never better, actually. My leg is ok, but I'm still afraid of rotations. In a few months it will be OK completely. I'm at 50% now. My body is that of a 25 year old man.” We’ve missed this sort of “no nonsense” talk from Cro Cop. It can only mean one thing: Cro Cop is back.

On June 13th, Cro Cop faced Mostapha Al Turk, a fighter feared by many non-UFC fighters. He won. By winning he gave a stern warning to all the other UFC heavyweights that he’s willing to die in order to win the UFC belt. The warning probably became even more acute when he signed the deal with Dream, a Japanese fighting organization. How? Resolute. Special forces. Rematch with Fedor. Motivation other than money, unlike before.... [Read More]
234 Views
» Helio Gracie Introduces New Fighting System
May 09, 2008 - 6:54 PM - by The Kraken!
Helio Gracie Introduces New Fighting System
by The Kraken!

The man who changed the face of fighting many decades ago is about to do it again. Helio Gracie has developed a new kickboxing discipline that's going to change fighting forever. No longer will qualities like size, speed, and power be a factor in determining who wins a fight - only technique. This is the Father of Modern MMA's assertion.

Speaking in English without a translator for the first time, Master Gracie laid out his vision:
"There one time was a time when to make fight and do win one had to pull a guard. Now time of this is over." (at this Helio grinned proudly to his sons - see pic below)

The famous fighting Gracie brothers


"I has trained the sons of me again from begin. No more they are man handlers on backs. Today is striker's world and tomorrow will is Gracie Tae Bo's world. I only haves sad that Ryan not live to master GTB."

Experts in all corners of the MMA world are desperately trying to figure out what the new techniques coming at them will be. Mirko "Cro Cop" Filipovich has one guess: "I am thinking they will try to kick me." When asked how he'd defend such an unexpected assault from a Gracie Tae Bo master, Mirko merely breathed into... [Read More]
787 Views
» Fuckers I Hate: Fight Night Edition #1
Apr 03, 2008 - 3:07 PM - by The Kraken!
Fuckers I Hate: Fight Night Edition #1
by MagnumCT


Welcome friends to the first edition of "Fuckers I Hate." I'm your host Magnum "Chicken" Tokyo. Tonight, I'll examine the latest UFC Fight Night for the fuckingest fuckers I fucking hate. Let's begin, shall we?

Frankie Edgar. Let's take a look at this fucker.

-This fucker is a wrestling coach at Rutgers. A wrestling coach. A COLLEGE wrestling coach. This fucker comes in with that distinction and proceeds to get tooled...in WRESTLING, by a guy named Gray. Gray.

-This fucker is named "Frankie." Hey Edgar, it's not even cute when a toddler goes by "Frankie," OK? All I can think of is Cody Banks, and I've never even SEEN that shit...or have I? We bring the mystery here on FIH. Frankie. Fuck. Fucking fucker. Also, he has two first names. Not cool.

Kenny Florian. Our good friend Luke "Slaughter" Stryzinski has already put the words to the hate of this particular fucker, but there's enough hate to go around for everyone. Luke almost got it covered, but no one can ascend Mount St. Eyebrows and plant the flag of hate on those expansive peaks. No one's hate is that all-encompassing. No one can soak those behemoths in a fiery torrent of rage and disgust. No one can. But I can. I will. I must. I have.

-I've hated this fucker... [Read More]
586 Views
» News Archive
Title, Username, & Date Last Post Replies Views
MMAthematical Proof (Mirko = Worst of All Time)
03-28-2008 01:45 AM
03-28-2008 01:45 AM
by Bulldog
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What Makes the Ultimate MMA Fighter?
03-13-2008 06:52 PM
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by The Kraken!
0 645
Everybody's Got A Fucking List!
01-08-2008 12:50 PM
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by The Kraken!
2 550
MMA Set To Blow Its Wad
12-05-2007 02:42 AM
12-05-2007 02:42 AM
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0 685
The Kraken! to cut down to 145 lbs for UFC 76
09-21-2007 10:19 PM
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